Time Flies

This is a short post, and yes it is very sappy, but I am way too emotional to be thought-provoking and witty right now.

Tonight I got to watch my son perform in his Fifth Grade musical performance.  He has attended this school for 7 years (it's preschool through 5th grade), and beyond his kindergarten performance, this is the one that touched me the most.  Sitting in the cafeteria, surrounded by familiar faces, watching our kids dance and sing and have fun - it was amazing.  Our kids have literally grown up together.  I've been sitting in that cafeteria with these parents and grandparents and siblings for 7 years.  It blows my mind how quickly the time has gone.  Look at all the amazing things our kids have accomplished in this time!  Learned to read, write, make friendships.  Play instruments, speak a new language.  We've gone from finger paint to algebra in 7 short years.  And yes, they were short.  This is something that I never truly understood until I became a parent, but the time just FLIES by.  Whether you're having fun or not.  It goes by in an instant.  These times that seem to be the very hardest in your life - you will look back on them fondly and think "I would do it all again".  And I would.  Sticky fingers, runny noses, reading the same book a million times each day, watching way too much Sesame Street.  Play time, toddler time, bath times, nap times.  Homework, and school lunches, projects, book reports, class parties, field trips, book fair, fundraisers.  I would do it all over again in a heartbeat.  Just keep that in mind, momma, as you're taking a deep, exasperated sigh before getting another cup of water, reading one more bedtime story, giving one more hug.  It goes by so fast.

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Good Grief... and Greater Grace

Do you ever feel anxious about something that you have said or done long after the fact?  Like, I still get anxiety about things that I said as a pre-teen.  That was QUITE a few years ago.  But I worry that THAT moment of awkwardness is the first thing people will think about when they remember me.  I have for a long time desired that I would be remembered as a loving, caring, sweet, kind-hearted woman full of grace by those who know me.  And yet, when I have heard people describe me it is in terms like "funny, witty, snarky, sarcastic, dark sense of humor" and the like.  Sure, those things DO describe me, but if I could trade, I would.  I was recently on an interview and afterward I called my friend who works in the same office and told her how it went.  She said "Oh, they called and asked me to tell them more about you and I said you were very black and white, that you would get things done, wouldn't let anyone push you around, and would call people on their crap."  I mean - I guess these are good things, but not quite the meek and mild spirit I have been longing to cultivate.  This is what I get for being a strong-willed child, I suppose.

Well ACTUALLY, my mother would inform you that what I get for being a strong-willed child is getting to RAISE a strong-willed child.  Joy of joys.  Seriously, 90% of the time I am praying that they will use their powers to lead the world and not a gang.

One of the struggles that I have been having with one particular strong-willed child in my house is homework.  Guys, really.  We are to the point where he is telling me "yes, I did my homework" and what he means is "I did my math homework, but not my language arts and my special project for this week".  Last night, as I was packing backpacks and making sure the house was ready for the next day, I chanced to flip through their planners.  Empty.  Blank homework pages.  Now, it was already about 10 pm, so I wasn't about to wake them up and make them do their homework.  But you better believe I had those boys out of bed and sat down at the table bright and early this morning.  My eldest tells me "well, I lost the list of spelling words on Tuesday, so I haven't been able to do this homework."  "Son, this is Friday.  Why wouldn't you get another spelling list when you were at school the other 3 days this week?!" You know what answer I got?  A shoulder shrug.

And then it happened.  I lost my ever-lovin' mind.  I went into a rant about how I have already passed the 5th grade, and that afforded me the luxury of not having to stay on top of 5th grade homework any more.  How I shouldn't have to (but did) ask online in the PTSA Facebook page for the 5th grade spelling list so that HE could finish his homework. How I thought we had already worked on this problem LAST  semester, and that I thought he had outgrown this.  How this was NEVER  going to happen again, and isn't he a lucky boy that he has a mom who is on top of things, and actually cares about his grades and makes sure he is being successful in school?

After I dropped them off (a few minutes late, because I made him finish his homework) at school this morning, I was seething quietly in my car in the parking lot for a few minutes.  You know what happened?  God got ahold of me.

"Jessi?  I thought we had worked on this temper.  This kind of frustration is NEVER going to happen again.  I have already paid for that sin.  I shouldn't be having to bring this to your attention because this is YOUR area of weakness. Aren't you a lucky woman that you have a God who is on top of things, and actually cares about your actions, words, and behavior to make sure you are successful in life?"  Yes, God can be sarcastic, folks.

You see, it is easy to WANT to respond with Grace.  It is a whole 'nuther thing to actually do it.  Did my son need me yelling at him this morning while he is hunched over his homework, worrying about being late for school?  Nope.  Wasn't the fact that he would have gotten a bad grade on his homework punishment enough?  Couldn't I have just said "well, you're going to get the grade you worked for" and left it at that?  Let him go off to school knowing that he had let me down, and that I was disappointed in his behavior, but not in him as a person?  That would have been the gracious, loving answer.

Aren't we so lucky (truthfully) that God doesn't respond to us the way we respond to others?  That there is never shame, or gloating, and that we never feel like He is doing us a favor by forgiving us?  His forgiveness is complete, He is not going to throw it back in our face and say "Do you remember the LAST time I forgave you for this?  You are so lucky that I am in such a forgiving mood, but this is not ever going to happen again."  God tells us in 1 John 1:9 that "if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us".  Is there something that you are struggling with today?  I encourage you to confess it to God, ask Him to forgive you of it, and ask Him to help you deal with it in your life.

For me, I will ask His forgiveness for my short temper this morning and ask that He continues to cultivate the desire and the ability in me to respond in Grace.  I'll also be asking forgiveness from the kids when they get home from school.  While I may have been justified in my reaction, it isn't the kind of memory I want them to have of their mother.  If I can't be remembered right now for my gracious spirit, I can at least be remembered as being a mother who was willing to see her own shortcomings, and who demonstrated to her children that you can always be working on yourself.

Sausage and Peppers

Shut the front door - this was delicious!  This is definitely a recipe to hold on to.  In hindsight, I would have maybe made it with less jalapenos, but oh well... it was so good!

This is the recipe for one of the meals on my January 2017 meal plan that I posted a few days ago - so you know that it is budget-friendly and simple to pull off.

Sausage & Peppers
1 package mild italian sausages
2 green bell peppers, cut into slices
2 red bell peppers, cut into slices
1 tsp garlic, chopped (I use the jar of minced garlic and I put in a teaspoon of that, I would imagine this is 1 good-sized clove if you are mincing it yourself)
salt to taste
pepper to taste
1 Tbsp olive oil
1 sweet onion, cut into slices
4 jalapenos, cut into slices

Preparation:
1. In a good-sized pot or large skillet (I used my big soup pot) heat the olive oil and sautee the garlic. Add the sausages and let them cook, browning all sides.
2. Remove sausage from the pot and set aside.
3. Add peppers, jalapenos, onions, salt and pepper.  Sautee until veggies are done to your liking and onions are translucent.
4. Slice the sausages into bite-sized pieces, about 1/2 inch.  Add to the pot.
5.  Cover and let cook for about 5 additional minutes.
6. Serve over rice, baked potatoes, with a nice roll, or however you would like!

Last night we had ours over baked potatoes. I am by no means a food photographer, but this gives you the general idea.  We loved it, and enjoyed the leftovers today for lunch over toast.

Enjoy!

"You're doing what?"

I recently had a conversation with a new dear friend about how crazy hectic our lives are.  And she pointed out to me just how busy J and I are. She's right!  I knew that we had a lot of irons in the fire, but when I really sat down and looked at it, we have a TON of them!  But we love it this way!  J and I are always looking to expand our knowledge, learn new skills and grow as people.  And if there is a way to do that AND to financially benefit our family - that's a win-win!  It is something that we have been trying to impart to our children, too, that if you can do it well and be successful the best person to work for is yourself.  If you need something done, learn the skill and learn how to do it yourself!  We've taught them about changing the oil and belts in the car, basic carpentry, animal care, gardening, cooking, etc.

Now, I haven't always been like this - even though I was raised to be self-sufficient.  I got lazy. There was a time in my life where I honestly just found it easier to be able to pay someone to do something for me.  If there was a service that I could afford, I had it.  To be entirely truthful, I got a bit of a rush out of being able to afford it.  It was almost a status symbol - which is a very ugly thing to admit.  But then I got to a point in my life where I found that I actually had forgotten the skills I had learned in my childhood, and realized that by allowing others to do something for me I was actually cheating myself out of the satisfaction of completing a challenge.  Thankfully I now look at almost everything and think "I can do that".  That shift in my thinking is what has led me to the life I have now, in all its crazy glory!

One of the first steps that I took toward that shift was partnering with Drs. Katie Rodan and Kathy Fields.  I had tried a direct sales business years ago and I was terrible at it - rarely making sales and never meeting any goals.  There are a lot of direct sales and network marketing companies out there, and I am certainly not taking the position that they are no good.  But I do want to point out some of the reasons why I chose R+F. About 3 years ago I saw a friend of mine who had partnered with Rodan + Fields and was having crazy success.  I watched and watched as her family was becoming more and more financially independent as she was achieving these goals and milestones in the company, and finally I messaged her and asked for more information.  I made the decision that night to invest in myself this time, rather than to buy into a company or a "scheme".  I purchased a business kit and became a consultant with R+F.  The reason why I say I partnered with the Doctors is because that really is what happened.  I own my R+F business outright, and it is an inheritable business for my children.  Not only am I building an income right now, but I am also securing an income for them in the future.

When I first heard about R+F and allowed my friend to tell me about it, one of the things that really struck me was the credibility of the doctors.  I'm sure you've heard of their other amazing product for acne - ProActiv! These are two Stanford-trained dermatologists who still have an active practice in the San Fransisco Bay Area.  That's right, you can make an appointment to go see them!  But, if you'd like to save on the co-pay and the wait time, you can just order their clinical grade products for everything from acne, sensitive skin, sun damage, wrinkles, redness, etc. on my personal website.

That was another thing - I have a website.  MY OWN website.  No one has to go to an impersonal corporate website and remember my consultant ID number or anything like that.  I don't have to take orders, handle payments, deliver products - that is all handled through the website itself.  AND as part of my business, the website has a back office section that has all of my business information.  Come tax time, I just log in and print off my reports and I am ready to go.  For the record, my personal site is https://jessical.myrandf.biz/

Another great point - all of my purchases are a business expense.  My business kit was a business expense that I was able to write off at the end of the year.  Because we are a word-of-mouth company, all of the products that I use myself and then tell people about (or share pictures of) is a business expense.  Which means that I'm able to write those off at the end of the year, too.  Any incentives, bonuses, giveaways, etc. that I may do during the year?  Business expense.

I'm not required to carry an inventory (although sometimes I do, just to have things on hand - once I had a friend who had a sunless tanner emergency and couldn't wait until her order would have been delivered. No problem, we had some locally for her to just pick up!).  I'm not required to have parties - I've occasionally had friends over for margaritas and to sample to products.  Sometimes I'll set out some samples at Starbucks or Chick Fil A while I am there, but having to schedule parties all the time?  Nope.  I run this entirely on my own time - that means that if there is a soccer game or field trip, I don't miss it because I have to be "at work".  I am completely available for my family at any time, and that was my whole goal in the first place.

I'm not going to lie - the final thing that pushed me to jump into this business was the income potential.  I mean honestly, where else do you have the ability to make this kind of income for working primarily from your computer talking about what you wash your face with?  I literally get paid to wash my face and tell people about it.  That's crazy.  What's crazier?  These numbers:

Now, if you have any questions for me - I would love to hear them.  If you want more information on the products, let me know - I love to share them.  I've had amazing results, and I've seen amazing results.  All of our products come with a 60-day money back guarantee, so why not give it a shot?  If you're interested in more information about the business and what it takes to make it work or even how to get started - send me a message!  There is no pressure, no obligation, no hard feelings if you decide it isn't for you.  But here's the thing.  What if it IS?

Grocery Store Victory

This is the story of how I fed my family of 4 for 3 weeks on $271.

You read that right.

4 people.

3 weeks.

No repeated meals.

$271.

AND we're eating real food - not just Ramen.

This morning on my FB page, I posted that I was going to try to tackle this challenge, and I got a few friends who gave me an encouraging thumbs-up.  Getting our grocery budget down to a manageable size has been a game that we have been playing for a few years now.  The kids like to take a calculator and total everything up as we are putting it in the cart.  We do meal plans and shopping lists, and try not to eat out too often (this, we fail at to an embarrassing extent, but we try).

BUT, with our current freeze on our spending - until our Etsy business (SHOP HERE PLEASE!) takes off we have about half of the income that we had previously - now it really isn't just for fun anymore.  We got our paycheck today and knew that we needed to really make this one count.

I spent a few hours on the computer this morning researching some meal plans that would go further.  I checked sales online, I loaded coupons to my card, and I made my grocery list.  Jasen and I met the kids at school to eat lunch with them, and then we bravely headed into the grocery store.  We knew that we had a goal of staying under $500 to get ALL of our groceries for the month - but I had this secret hope that I could keep it at $300.  J was getting a little nervous as we hauled 2 VERY full grocery carts through the store, but when we totaled it up - he was THRILLED!

I posted my victory as a reply to my original FB post and several friends were surprised as well, so I thought "hey, I need a new blog post, and people are asking me how I did this - ta da!".

Now that you've read through all of that - I will actually post my meal plan for the rest of January, AND my shopping list. The shopping list has the main ingredients that I needed for my meal plan.  Of course there are things that are needed like spices, sugar, flour, etc. that I had in my pantry already.  Yes, I see that eggs are on there.  My chickens are free-loading good-for-nothings.  I had to buy eggs.  There is also a column for things for the kids - that is what we needed to make lunches & snacks for the rest of the month.  I didn't have too many coupons - I had one for $.30 off when you buy 2 15 oz. cans of tomato sauce, so I bought 6 of those, instead of 3 of the larger cans.  They were $.49 each, so it would have been $2.94, but with the coupon I paid $2.04.  The large cans were $1.29, so it would have been $3.87 to get 3 of those.  I had one coupon for $1 off 2 boxes of Jolly Time popcorn, which were on sale 2/$4.  I had a $3 off coupon for the meat department.  I can post recipes for what I'm making if you would like them - just shout out in the comments.  If you're enjoying reading the escapades of mine - please subscribe to my blog.  It makes my heart happy :)

Meal Plan - January 2017
1/10 - Crock pot Beef & Broccoli, Rice
1/11 - Spaghetti & Meatballs, Salad
1/12 - Egg Fried Rice
1/13 - Black Bean & Corn Quesadillas
1/14 - Mini Corn dog Bites, French Fries
1/15 - Meatball Subs, Salad
1/16 - Spinach 3-cheese Stuffed Shells
1/17 - Split Pea Soup & Grilled Cheese
1/18 - Pasta with bacon & peas
1/19 - Asian Stir Fry, Rice
1/20 - BBQ Pulled Pork, French Fries
1/21 - Roasted Chicken, Mixed Veggies, Baked Potatoes
1/22 - Macaroni & Cheese, Peas
1/23 - Chicken Enchilada Bake, Corn
1/24 - Breakfast Burritos
1/25 - Teriyaki Chicken Meatballs, Rice, Broccoli
1/26 - Eggplant Parmesan
1/27 - Chicken Pot Pie Soup
1/28 - Pierogies with Caramelized Onions and Bacon
1/29 - BBQ Chicken Thighs
1/30 - Meatloaf, Mixed Veggies
1/31 - DIY Pizzas

Grocery List

FOMO

Have you heard of FOMO?  Do you suffer from it?  I don't.  I'm one of those people that frequently regrets making plans because it means that I have to go out.  You know. OUT THERE.  Which is, by definition - not HERE.  Here is where I am comfortable and would prefer to be.

In case you aren't up on the lingo - FOMO is "Fear Of Missing Out".  Where you have anxiety that something exciting or interesting is happening in a place other than where you are.

This is definitely not me.  I'm fine.  I enjoy spending time with my friends - don't get me wrong.  But I definitely don't have any anxiety that if I am staying in for the night I may be missing something wonderful.  

But some people do have that urge to find out what they are missing out on, because they are sure that there is SOMETHING they are missing out on.  Something is missing, and even if they don't know what it is, they know that they are missing out on it and they want it.

That got DH and I to thinkin' the other day.  Isn't that a pretty constant state for people?  No matter who you are, or where you are from - what culture, what language, what color, what religion, etc. It doesn't matter.  People - and I mean "humans" - are always searching for something more.  There is some void in our lives that needs to be filled.  We fill it with different things - education, hobbies, family, vacations, work, and on and on and on.  But we are always trying to fill it with something.  

He and I had a conversation the other day where I was explaining to him that I felt a little empty lately.  We have so many things going on in our lives right now, that it is hard to imagine feeling anything other than FULL.  Our kids are in elementary school, we have all these animals and things to take care of around our house.  DH left his job, so he is home and working on the woodworking business (check out our projects here) and getting started with going back to school.  I'm also looking at finishing my degree, I work part time doing childcare, I work my Rodan + Fields business (for product information click here), and working on the new home decor projects (stop by our Etsy shop), and that is all on top of the regular responsibilities of being a homemaker.  How on earth could I be feeling empty?

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We started thinking about it and praying over it, and that's when I discovered what was going on.  I have been trying to fill my life up with STUFF.  How can I help support my family?  How can I be a better wife and mother?  How can I make this time together more special?  How can I balance all of these responsibilities?  Why wasn't this enough?  What else was it that I was chasing?

And then, because God is good and because He loves us - He answered that question in the sweet, calm way that He tends to do.  During our Bible study the other day, one of the verses tucked away in a passage I was reading - which had NOTHING to do with this question - hit the nail right on the head.  

Psalm 27:8

"My heart says of you, "Seek His face!".  Your face, LORD, I will seek."

God created us because He wants to have a relationship with us.  And He created us to want that relationship with Him.  That is the thing that we are craving - even if we don't know it.  That is the hole we are trying to fill in our lives.  That is what we are searching for when we can't seem to find what we are missing.  Our hearts are longing for a relationship with Him.  In this verse in Psalms, God is literally impressing it on our hearts to come and talk with Him.  Come and visit with Him. 

So this week, I am making a more conscious effort to say "LORD, I am on my way".

A little challenge for you: do you feel like you are missing something in your life?  Do you feel like you are constantly chasing after something and never reaching it, or never being satisfied?  Well... why don't you come and talk to Him about it?  See what He says.

Leap of Faith

I know we've all heard that saying so many times.  "You just have to have faith", "step out in faith", "keep the faith", "take a leap of faith".  For me, so many of this cliche phrases lose their meaning from overuse.  Sure, it's easy to know that I should have faith.  It is far more involved to actually HAVE faith.

How do I know that I have faith?  Or enough faith?  Even the apostles struggled with this question.  In Luke 17:5 they cried out "Increase our faith!"  How do I have faith?  I get to know Christ.  I spend time in the Word, with the Word.  I read and listen and ponder in my heart and trust and acknowledge the quiet presence of the Lord in my life.

Easier said than done.  I know.

Trust me.  I know. 

We are in a season right now where we as a family need tremendous faith.  Just in the past three weeks our lives seem to have taken a sharp left turn from the direction that we thought we were going.  We've gone from DH working full time, and me working my DS business and being a SAHM full-time and added in: blogging, our Etsy shop (check us out Lone Star By Lee), a custom woodworking business, and DH having to walk away from his current position.  We have prayed, cried, agonized over these decisions for the last several days, and although we are scared to death - we are stepping out in faith.  We are claiming the promise of Christ in Matthew 21:21-22 “Truly, I say to you, if you have faith and do not doubt, you will not only do what has been done to the fig tree, but even if you say to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and thrown into the sea,’ it will happen. And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive, if you have faith.”

This evening as I am writing this, I feel a bit like Noah.  How crazy did he sound to his family and friends?  I mean think about it, the man was building a MASSIVE boat becuase God told him that there was going to be water falling from the sky.  So much water that it would cover the earth and kill every living thing not on that boat.  Guys, it had NEVER. RAINED. BEFORE.  The plants were watered by a mist that rose up from the ground.  But water falling from the sky was unheard of.  Tht would be like me telling you that tomorrow I can go out and eat the clouds for breakfast.  That makes zero sense.  And yet, there was Noah, for YEARS being faithful and and following God's directions.  And now here I am.  Moving forward with a plan that doesn't make much sense to myself or to those around, trusting completely that God has a plan for me (Jeremiah 29:11), and that God has set these events in motion as part of His plan.  I just have to keep moving forward on the path He has already laid out.

So tonight, I will rest in the comfort and peace of Matthew 6:26 which says "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?"

If you do not have a Bible that you are in love with, or you are looking for another one (I counted... I have 7 Bibles on my bookshelf.  Maybe this is my favorite thing to collect?) please consider this one - it is my favorite, and has side notes and annotations that have really spoken to me.

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